When I had my first girl crush, I didn’t know if it was a phase or real feelings. Mainly because I never had a crush on a girl before. After the first time failing with a female I had my doubts if I was really attracted to females like I thought I was. I actually came to the realization that I was emotionally attracted to females and I just felt like I would be happy with a female. My second girl crush was my best friend T at the time. I was nervous to tell her because we always just been friends and from personal experience I know how that’s going to turn out. I left my feelings unspoken at the time but that backfired because someone shot their shot with her (silly). I flirted around with other females within the time. I hadn’t dated a female until March 2018 that’s when my best friend became my girlfriend. I finally poured my heart out to her. Sweet right? I’m not going to go in too much details (if you want to know about our relationship check out my post “first girlfriend”). When I got with her that’s when I came to the realization that if I wanted to spend my life and marry a female it will be her.
I haven’t really become myself because not a lot of people know that I like girls and guys except the ones I felt comfortable telling. I’ve gotten a lot of down talk about being Bisexual because a lot of people thinks I’m confused because I like both. At first, I felt like I was because I wasn’t being true to myself about what I like. I still haven’t came out to a lot of people mainly because I feel like I already know what they will think and say. But I don’t care at the same time what they think of me. Coming out is a big step in someone life and I feel it should be made when they are ready. I’ve officially been true to myself and officially came out to myself. I guess you can say I “came out”. I’m not looking for approval from anyone anymore. I’m still the same person I was years ago. I’m just accepting myself for who I am.
I’m going to close this post by saying remember to be true to yourself first before anyone else. Communicate with your partner first to let them know you aren’t comfortable yet to be open to the public first.